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Monday, April 2, 2007

On the nature of mayonnaise -a comic interlude


The other day, necessity demanded that I stop for fast food. I ordered a no-frills cheeseburger, but in my hurry I neglected to make my standard request: “no mayonnaise, please.” I belatedly realized this as I drove up to the window to receive it, hoping against hope that it was only hamburgers that included the standard mayo, and that this cheeseburger might somehow be exempt (just ketchup?). Unfortunately, I was out of luck, for this cheeseburger too seemed bound by that law of fast-food culture: “mayonnaise is a staple and must be abundantly (extravagantly even) applied to the surface of any item that consists of bread and meat products.” Yuck.
Perhaps it is primarily the texture of mayonnaise that grosses me out, that and its vagueness of flavor (for that reason a few members of my family prefer Miracle Whip, which I do not find to be much of an improvement). I find it necessary to keep the stuff in the house for those rare occasions when I make tuna or deviled eggs, for which I tolerate the minimal amount of mayo required. However, on all other occasions I try to avoid it. I was reminded of why, as I tried to ignore the globs of mayonnaise enough to eat the cheeseburger. It saturated the lettuce, squished throughout the bun, and splurted out of the edges; there was just no ignoring it! Annoyed, I discarded the top bun and pathetic lettuce, as they were far beyond the simple remedy of wiping away the excess mayonnaise. Why is this stuff considered so indispensable, and how did we get this way?
I have found that, the more I understand something, the more I appreciate it; so, I decided to find out more about the origins of mayonnaise. I came across this website, which shed a good bit of light on the history of mayo. Apparently, it’s not as recent of an invention as I had thought; it is at least two-hundred years old. According to the
“what’s cooking America” website’s history of sauces:


“Most authorities believe the first batch of this mixture of egg yolks, oil and seasonings was whipped up to celebrate the 1756 French capture of Mahon, a city on the Spanish Isle of Minorca, by forces under Louis-Francois-Armad de Vignerot du Plessis, duc de Richelieu (1696-1788). The Duke, or more likely, his personal chef, is credited with inventing mayonnaise, as his chef created a victory feast that was to include a sauce made of cream and eggs. Realizing that there was no cream in the kitchen, the chef substituted olive oil for the cream and a new culinary creation was born. Supposedly the chef named the new sauce "Mahonnaise" in honor of the Duc's victory…”

I suppose I have more of an appreciation now for the longevity of mayonnaise, and a new understanding of its classification (“sauce”, not just “spread”), but I’m afraid that knowledge hasn’t altered the preferences of my taste buds any. So to you mayonnaise lovers out there, more power to you and less mayo for me, thank you very much!

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