Wishing wells

I have spent quite a bit of time observing other people's romantic relationships, learning vicariously from their mistakes, and spinning philosophical thoughts like this around and around. This is one observation of many:
Some folks approach their relationship as if the other person were a wishing well, and they cast their dreams, opinions, desires, ambitions, and destinies into that person and stand looking over the edge, waiting for their wishes to come true. But those things aren't just pennies or fish food that get cast into the wishing well, they are pieces of a person's heart, future, body, and spirit. If the wishes don't come true, those pieces have to be regrown, they can't be grafted back on...one must start over. They were doomed to failure if they wanted to fulfill Self at the expense of the Other, or even if they simply neglected to give up some wishes in order to receive the valuable things the other person could offer.
Sometimes this trial-and-error experience may be the only way to learn who and what is NOT right, so that one can recognize what IS right when it comes along. Which makes me wonder: when it is my turn, will I step up to look into the well of another person and only see my own reflection, waiting for me to throw my wishes in, or will I have the strength of spirit to look deep enough for long enough to find what is truly below the surface? Will I search for hidden treasure and find it, in spite of the weeds, the skeletons, and the pieces of other people that have been left behind? And if I find only skeletons, will I have been smart enough to bring a lifeline to pull myself back up and out of that well? And while I'm on a roll with the rhetorical questions and metaphors, what would someone find if they came to me not seeking a wishing well, but a well from which they could drink in order to stay alive? Would they keep coming back to me for more, because there is enough substance and depth that there will always be enough encouragement, ideas, compassion, prayers, and conversations to nourish the soul? Can I share the Source of my wellspring in such a way that, whoever draws something out of me will get a helping of the Source, too? Finally, can I be humble enough to clean my own well regularly, so that my analysis of self and others is filtered fairly and with good judgement?